24 Sept 2011

Death Trap - Lisa's Review

*Spoilers*

Good gawd!!! I'm not going to mess about this week, for 2 reasons. I don't have time and I don't want to waste any more valuable time on this piece of crap. Ok, so it made me laugh in places but how the hell can Mr Hooper be responsible for this? I am aghast!!! I can see how he tried to recapture the mood of the fantastic 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre' in places, but he failed miserably.

The basic premis here is a creepy guy (Judd) who runs a equally creepy motel/hotel (I never can tell the difference) in the middle of nowhere. He has a pet crocodile (very plasticy and fake looking it has to be said) that seems permanently pissed off and hungry. Coming to think of it, some of 'Judds' performance must have been ok as he made me shudder and cringe every time he was on the screen.

The movie had an uncomfortable undertone to it which would have worked had the storyline, acting and effects not been so shite.

The first victim is a ex prostitute who, not too keen to take it up the bum from a very young Mr Kruger (he's shown up in 2 of these movies now), is sacked by the brothel madam and seeks refuge in the hotel with the aforementioned Judd. On discovering who she is, he decides to attack her. This and the original fumbling attempted rape scene with Robert Englund seem to have no place in the movie and are neither titillating (thank gawd) nor disturbing so there hardly seemed a point. Unable to have his wicked way with her, he stabs her repeatedly with a pitchfork.

Several others follow, including a couple and their kid with their pet dog. Obviously the pet dog is eaten. It looks so bad and inoffensive, you can't get angry or sad about it and coming from me about a dog death, that's saying something! The dad decides to shoot the croc for eating his daughters dog, but he is attacked by Judd with a scythe and is then fed to the crocodile.

The original prostitutes parents (Harvey & Libby) arrive looking for her, they are sent to the brothel blah blah blah, investigations take place. The madam denies ever having seen her.

After much backing and forth, everyone it seems has been eaten by the croc apart from the original little girl, Angie (who has been tied up under the house by Judd), Faye, Angies mother and the mother of the prostitute, Libby, who has been sensible enough to stay away from the hotel for a while, her husband, Harvey, met a nasty end while investigating Angies cries - scythe and croc again just for the record.

We end, as expected with Judd being eaten by his own pet crocodile.

This movie is monumentally awful. Maybe I should watch it again and give it another chance as I was a bit distracted when I watched it, but from what I did see, I can't say i'm desperate to waste any more valuable time.

Would definately not recommend for any reason.



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