25 Aug 2012
SS Experiment Love Camp - Lisa's Review
*** SPOILERS ***
So ANOTHER Nazi Sexploitation movie *YAWN*. The last one I am assured, thank gawd!
What to say? This movie is a big steaming pile of poo. It probably didn't help that I had to watch it on a faulty laptop which made a constant loud whirring noise the entire time, but I don't think the comfort of a lounge on the sofa and my DVD player would have made much difference.
Soooo, a storyline? Hmmmm lots of attractive German females POW's who are used in experiments, mostly sexual, in order to spawn the perfect Arian race. There are non sexual experiments but they seem to be reserved for the less attractive of the women and seem to have no place in the movie at all. Everything seems to have a very 'tame' nature to it. I know that sounds like an odd thing to say and I'm not saying I have a penchant for watching horrid human experiments or rapes, but if you're going to do this kind of movie, surely the aim is to shock, disgust, infuriate? This movie is neither strong enough nor clever enough to evoke any kind of emotion, other than perhaps mild amusement and boredom.
The rapes for example (as that's what they were) seemed to be something the women enjoyed. There was no need for violence or restraint as would have been the case in this situation. I neglected to say that it is a woman in charge of the experiments (reminiscent of The Beast in Heat), but the acting is so poor and the dubbing is so bad, there was no way you could take her seriously.
While i'm on the subject of not taking something seriously, can I point out that another of the reasons the experiments are being carried out were to find a 'replacement pair of testicles' for a colonel who lost his by way of a rather vicious prostitute. He wants to find the perfect pair of balls to replace what he's missing. Step forward Helmut, a patriotic German willing to do anything for his country. I don't think he quite knew what he would be sacrificing however.
His balls are indeed removed in a shoddy looking operation and are left in a dish in all their glory, just for our amusement. The most amusing thing of all however, is that Helmut has no idea his bits have been removed until he tries to have sex with a prisoner he is having a relationship with. On discovery that he has been castrated, he rushes to his superior and demands to know "What have you been doing with my balls?"... I kid you not! This is a serious line of dialogue!
I'm not really sure what else I can say about this movie as I my previous paragraph left you with an idea as to the 'quality' of this movie. I thought it sucked. It was weak and didn't achieve what it set out to. I don't think it would have even titillated the perverts amongst the viewers as it was so mild, not even up to soft porn standards. I should have known straight away to be honest. An early scene in the movie where the female prisoners are ordered to shower as they stink should also give an idea as to the quality we should expect. They all stand around giggling and moaning with pleasure as the camera zooms in on their 'that really needs a waxing/shaving' bits. I mean seriously?? If all I can think about is how badly these women need to tend to their gardens, what hope does the movie have?
I won't stick an 'avoid' on this weeks movie, but its only just escaped. Congratulations 'What have you been doing with my balls' line. A chuckle saved you.
Please use the comments bellow only to comment on this post - to write your own review, please comment on the main post for this movie.