Showing posts with label Squik. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Squik. Show all posts

22 Oct 2011

SHOCKTOBER SPECIAL: Mikey - Will's Review


NOTE: In honour of Halloween, We're taking a break from the DPP list.


This weeks movie was selected because (although it was too recent to make the DPP list) it was banned in the 1990's 'Video Nasty' style scare that followed the murder of the murder of James Bulger in 1993. It remains Banned in the UK to this day.

First things first: why is this banned? I cant help but think it was an emotionally charged, nanny-state type decision, and that if this were re-submitted today it would be passed uncut, rated 15!


It looks and feels very much like a TV movie - in fact, I don't recall anyone swearing in it, and it's presented in 4:3 - it could actually BE a TV movie...

So, in the opening scenes, Mikey kills his adopted family, pretends a stranger did it, and is quickly re-alloated to a new couple who, for some reason, are not told that Mikey (supposedly) witnessed his last family being murdered - this sounds to me like the kind of information you might want to know about your kid, but hay-ho!

The remainder of the film is spent watching Mikey being just a little disturbed, before slowly degenerating into the calculating psychopath we already know him to be.

He momentarily flips at one point and (deliberately) allows his adopted mother to catch him watching his home-made video of carnage, which annoyed me, and was out of character, especially as he resorted just as quickly to his calmly sadistic self.

There's a VERY uncomfortable scene where the neighbours eldest (a girl in her late teens / early twenties) is blatantly flirting with the 10 year old Mikey!

If the sexes were reversed, I could probably be arrested for posting this!

All in all a lacklustre affair, Killer kid movies have been done FAR better!

Body Count: 9
Animal Body Count: 2
Boob Count: 1 pair (just)
Most Memorable Death: Batter Up!


Please use the comments bellow only to comment on this post - to write your own review, please comment on the main post for this movie.

15 Oct 2011

SHOCKTOBER SPECIAL: Xtro - Will's Review


NOTE: In honour of Halloween, We're taking a break from the DPP list.

This weeks movie was selected because (although it never made the list) it was often seized by the police during DPP raids, and is often mistakenly listed as a "Video Nasty".

When Sam is abducted by aliens In a flash of light, the only witness is his young son, Tony. Needless to say, no one believes Tony, and it is assumed that Sam has run out on his wife and kid.

3 years later (apparently - Tony doesn't seem to have aged in that time) Sam comes back, a new man... 

It's that time of year, and I've been running my annual side project Shocktoberfest, where I kick back and (try to) enjoy the movies without making notes. I've found that, no only do I have more fun, but the reviews come easier (truth be told, my "notes" read more like a synopsis, which seems to cloud the way I talk about, and judge, the films) so (apart from keeping my tally) I've flown note-free on this too...

This could have been a very cool film if they'd kept us in the dark for a while; had same come back, seeming himself but doing occasional wierd shit, like eating his son's snakes eggs, but not really telling us is Sam really was kidnapped, or just mad...

From the family's point of view (Tony, mum and mums new fella') this is pretty much what happens, unfortunately viewers know all along, as we see an alien creature (Cheap looking, but still kind of awesome) land, kill a couple of folks and do something strange to a woman's face before melting into a puddle of extra-terrestrial snot, before Sam returns by (spoiler, highlight to see) being born, whole, adult and rather graphicly, from the uturus of the woman who got face raped !!! 

So Sam informs Tony that he was taken to another world, where he was "changed" so that he could survive there, and that he's come back for his boy. He passes on his changes (including some bonkers mind-over matter skills - more on that later) to his lad via what looks like a lovebite - squik!

From the 'not-really-a-mystery' portion of events, we progress to the 'mad-as-pants' part of the movie, as  Tony transforms 2 of his toys into a life-size killer action man, and a midget clown with a lethal yo-yo, before turning the nanny into an egg machine, and having the midget fill the refrigerator with grey porridge in which to incubate said eggs.

Tony's Mum, unaware that her house is fast becoming a messed-up drugs vision, but fully aware that her husband is back after 3 years, staying with her and her fiancĂ©e, claiming to have possibly been abducted by aliens and now claiming amnesia (which, by the way, she is totally unfazed by), has elected to take Sam back to thier holiday cottage (where the abduction took place) to help him get his memories back.

A flame is rekindled and (mid coitus) we enter what I call in my head the 'Brindle Fly' segment, as Sam begins to slowly turn back into his alien form - one puss filled welt at a time!

Despite the insanity, the ending is so wonderfully bleak, that you have to give this movie a bit of a pass - it's nothing if not entertaining, even if it does suffer a bit from madness.

Apparently there are 2 sequels, which I may check out some time around the end of 2012, when this protect is over (or possibly for this or next Shocktoberfest... who knows!)

Body Count: 7
Boob Count: 2 pairs
Animal Body Count: 1.5 (one and an egg)
Most memorable Death: What a Big Baby!

Please use the comments bellow only to comment on this post - to write your own review, please comment on the main post for this movie.